Anger could be an unpleasant emotion for you and those around you. Usually anger is due to other emotions or situations.
Anger is a normal emotion that every human being experiences, and depending on how you manage and express it, it can be overwhelming for you or people around you. Sometimes anger is trying to communicate something to you that you have not paid enough attention to before.
Usually people associate anger with violence and aggression, shouting, hitting, or destroying things. These behaviours could be the result of bottling up emotions and anger and is only there to help you to release the emotional “storage” over the time.
Anger, as any other emotion, is a messenger, it tries to inform you about a problem, to keep you alert; it is the natural reaction when we feel threatened, attacked or in danger, and prepares us to survive and defend yourself from a dangerous situation. It comes from the times when humas lived in caves and had to survive in an environment full of threat.
Recognizing and dealing with anger in a healthy way can convert your anger to a positive and constructive emotion, and becomes your best resource to create solutions to problems, as well as motivate you to do things and protect you.
As anger protects humans from danger, the body needs to prepare itself to run or fight, usually the first symptoms that you experience are physical, some of the could be:
- Tense muscles
- Increase in your heartbeat.
- Feeling hot.
- Tight chest.
- Clenching your fists.
- Shaky legs.
- Changes in your breathing, usually becoming short.
- Urge to use the toilet.
The list above only stated physical symptoms; emotions usually generate psychological symptoms and changes in your behaviours as well. When you are angry you can also experience:
- Feeling nervous.
- Argue often.
- Feeling furious.
- Being easily irritated.
- Start fights.
- Feeling frustrated.
- Breaking things
- Resenting other people.
- Unable to relax.
- React aggressively to small problems or situations.
- Feeling stressed.
- Say things that you do not mean and could hurt others.
- Getting annoyed easily.
- Be violent.
- Wanting revenge.
Usually anger could make you feel embarrassed, ashamed, sad and anxious after you express your anger in front of others, or when you think that you are about to lash out. These feelings can also generate other mental health difficulties like depression and anxiety, so getting professional help is important to avoid having more difficulties.
If anger is generating difficulties instead of helping you to solve problems and create new positive situations, psychologists, therapists and counsellors can help you, some people call this help anger management. Therapy will allow you to use your anger in a constructive way, identify why and when your anger could be unpleasant and transform your emotion into a more useful experience.
If you are struggling with anger, complete the contact box or chat to me to organise a 10-minute free telephone conversation to check if I can help you to manage your anger successfully.